In my last journal entry, I talked about being at sort of an impasse spiritually. I was dealing with conflict in myself, in my faith, and in my life in general. I think now, with all of the work I've thrown into bettering my life, spiritually and otherwise, I can finally say with conviction that I am a Pagan woman. I am always facing challenges to it, even in my own home, but I know I can back up a lot of what I believe with factual information, scientific theory, and personal experience.
So I guess some people in my little spiritual circle find it interesting that I have fallen in love with a man who is the perfect contradiction and at the same time the perfect compliment to me. Spiritually, we conflict on a lot of things such as whether or not what is written in the Bible in unequivocally true (his idea) or a compilation of stories that have been translated so many times one can't take anything said in the book literally (my idea). I don't deny him his ability to believe as he chooses, and he doesn't deny me mine, but he does like to challenge the things that I have learned to have truth to them. I know for a fact the Earth is made up of energy--he doesn't deny that, but he won't accept that humans have the capability to manipulate that energy because we are a part of it, not separate from it. That is, at it's core, the basis for many Earth-centered religions-- the use of the Earth's natural energy to bring about our own success or demise and that we are able to do so because we are a part of that energy. At the same time, he and I have the same warped sense of humor, he doesn't judge me for what I believe in and refuses to let me lose faith in it or myself, even if our being together could potentially get him in trouble with the local religious leaders only because I am pagan, and traditionally pagans are seen as "the Devil's right-hand" among the people with whom he worships. He knows better, and yet his faith teaches this and it conflicts with what he knows to be true.
Still, life brings new twists and turns, and my faith is constantly being challenged by it.
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